Being Human
by SwordDraconis113
Summary: "Oh, right. Lauren, I forgot to tell you, I'm being hunted down by the Dark Fae and it's all your fault." A crazy road trip, featuring one exhausted human doctor, and one snarky human Morrigan. Also featuring guns, explosion and ex-military friends with a love for knitting. Post Season 4 Alternate Universe with no Rainer plot line (Kenzi's alive AU)
1. Grand Theft Auto

**1. Grand Theft Auto**

The mistake was opening the front door. Lauren took one glance, her brain processing who it was and her body seized. She tried step away, but Evony slammed against her, throwing Lauren's body against the wall head first. Her fingers wrapped around the doctor's throat, squeezing her fingers around the larynx.

Terrified, Lauren gasped, holding her breath as a knife came to her jugular, held in the other hand. Her brain went into overdrive, reliving the last few seconds to understand what happened. The conclusion was simple; she was about to die.

"You did this to me," Evony hissed out. "You self-righteous bitch. I did nothing to you, I helped you and for what?" Lauren opened mouth and the knife pressed closer against her artery, cutting into the first layer of skin. Jaw tightening, she tried to breathe, but Evony was pressed against her lungs, restricting movement. "I survived everything against warlords and barbarians and kings. I spent years rising to the top, surviving things you couldn't even imagine and then I get taken down by you? A human scientist?"

Lauren stared at her wordlessly. She could see Evony's eyes flashing, feel her breath snarling against her. The hand around her throat tightened and she choked, gasping against it. She stilled as the knife pressed closer, the blade at a seventy-five degree angle against her throat.

She was going to die and the last conversation passed between Bo and her had been a fight about joining the Dark Fae.

Nothing but silence held between them and Lauren raised her eyes again, determined to meet her attacker head on. She watched Evony breathe, the anger swell murderously in her before something broken flickered in the dark eyes. Lauren gasped.

Evony cried out, pressing her hand against the esophagus "Who do you think you are?" the knife nicked her skin, and Lauren felt hot blood slip down her throat. She was shaking, her throat swelling with words she couldn't say. "I'll slit your throat, I'll shred it for your little succubus to find. And wouldn't that just be a divine sight to behold?"

"Ev-"

"Don't you dare say my name." Lauren tried to breathe, bring oxygen to the brain and focus on what was happening. She could feel blood slipping down her throat, the knife against her wound. There was a loud pounding in her ears that she knew was her heart racing, blood pulsing oxygen through her body.

By now the hypothalamus has told the nervous system to send out impulses to glands and muscles. Her adrenal medulla has released epinephrine, relaxing her muscles, slowing her breath to stop her from panicking while keeping her heart rate up. Simultaneously, Norepinephrine has rushed through her body, making her aware of every breath Evony pulled, of how dilated her pupils were and the perspiration on her skin.

But even when adrenocorticotropic hormone is released by the pituitary gland, Lauren wouldn't have an escape plan. She has nothing except fear and a whole cocktail of hormones trying to get her to fight or run.

"I did nothing to you and you gave me this- this life!"

Humanity. She gave her humanity. Lauren stared, watching Evony's eyes flitter. She was so close, Lauren could see droplets on the end of her eyelashes.

"You took away what I was, you took away everything I built, and for what? Because I have no idea what I've done to you Lauren? I have a long list of enemies and I know what I did to each and every one of them but you? You're this wild card!" Evony's throat crackled and Lauren swallowed roughly at the noise.

She did this.

Leanan Sidhe; their feeds rushed through Lauren's head. Books and papers she read and written about them piling up in her mind. Dammit.

"Are you-?"

"Don't," she warned. "So help me, I will kill you if you dare suggest-" her throat cut off and Lauren watched her swallow then grasp at pride. Evony blinked rapidly, shaking her head. She growled and pushed Lauren backwards, banging her head against the wall.

Darkness receded over Lauren's eyes, a dull moan pulled, constricted against the fingers. She could see the ex-Morrigan breathing rapidly, feel her finger's shaking against her throat. Then, Evony pulled away, taking a gulped breath. Shaking, the knife slipping from her grasp as she grabbed her waist, knees collapsing.

Lauren reached out, catching her as she placed a hand on the wound. Evony's hand, pinned underneath, was clamped over the damp dress, sticky and red.

"You're bleeding," she said. "What happened?"

Between clenched teeth, Evony hissed out, "I'm fine."

"You're human now. This wound can kill you. Just let me-"

"I said I'm fine!" she snapped, trying to pull away. Her movements were sluggish. Right now, epinephrine and norepinephrine were becoming diluted inside her. Lauren reached forward, grabbing her arm. "Stop it!" she snapped, her gaze faltered. The urge to lean against Lauren shook her fingers, constricting around her heart.

"You're in shock."

"I'm not in shock. I don't get in shock. That's-"

"Human. Emotional shock, as well as physical. You'll go into the latter if I don't stop this bleeding. Let me fix this." Evony glared, breathing out through her teeth. "You could die. Please, just let me stitch the wound."

"Isn't that what you wanted?" she asked. "Me dead? Isn't that why you...did this?" she was out of breath, eyelids growing heavy. Lauren's gaze flickered from her face, the dress, working out how much blood was lost. "Tell me you wanted this, Lauren."

"No." The answer was soft, and the resolve Evony held, loosened. She didn't stop Lauren this time when she reached out.

"Why should I let you help?" she asked, lifting her chin defiantly at her. "After everything you did?"

"Because." Lauren steadied, still holding Evony's hand to the wound as she lifted them both onto their feet. "You came here," she said. "After you were attacked."

"Oh please, don't flatter yourself." The eye roll was tiredly thrown, her eyelids flickering. "I hate you. I want you dead. Permanently. Head mounted on the wall...blah blah imagine some…" her hand flicked, "grande Bond villain speech. I'm too tired to come up with one."

"I know." Lauren helped her over to the couch before grabbing her medical kit. Evony's head rolled against the spine, eyes shutting. "Don't fall asleep.

"Oh bite me. I know you do." Opening her eyes, she found Lauren kneeling before her. Staring up at her, her mouth parted, hesitant to say something as she opened the first aid. "What? It's not like you haven't been there before."

"You need to take your dress off." The glare was sharp, dangerous enough that Lauren fumbled briefly before she stepped forward. Evony snapped backwards from her, holding her hatred firmly in place. Lauren shuddered, there was something else in the expression.

Something she never thought to find on the Morrigan's face. Shit. She never thought any of this would happen. The expression twisted sharply in her gut and Lauren looked away, nauseous. "I-I can't look at the wound when you're..."

Evony's shoulders fell, her hand gesturing for Lauren to go at it because she clearly couldn't do it herself.

"I'm sorry."

"Fuck you."

Lauren let out a breath, oddly comforted by the words before reached forward. Her finger were steady as she unzipped the red material and slowly peeled it down her body. The Morrigan's skin flinched, trembling as the material pulled from the stab wound.

This time, Lauren bit back the apology, Evony didn't want it. She wanted results.

With the dress, hanging around her hips, Lauren snapped on her gloves. This was just another patient. She checked Evony's expression, making sure she was conscious, before reaching forward, slowly touching the edges to examine the wound. Deep, not deep enough to nick vital organs. She moved to her other equipment. Evony, thankfully, remained quiet as she cleaned the blood from her skin, giving her an area to disinfect before she numbed the wound.

Relief flooded through her as Evony eyes shut again, her muscles relaxing before Lauren stitched the wound together. Tensing only briefly at the sensation.

"Almost over." Lauren cleaned the wound again, bandaging it up before she snapped off her gloves and disposed of the used utensils. Evony went to tug the dress back on before Lauren's hand grabbed her wrist. "Just...get out of the dress. I'll get you something."

She returned shortly, loose cotton pants and shirt in hand. Evony's hesitant but smart enough to allow help getting into the clothes, Lauren immediately moved shortly thereafter to get rid of the dress before Evony could realise what was happening to her favourite Chanel number.

"Why are you doing this?" Evony asked when a glass of orange juice and food was pushed into her hands. Lauren blinked at her, tucking strands of blonde hair behind her ear. She's uncertain of the answer, but too afraid not to.

"Because," Lauren sighed, "whether you believe it or not, killing you is not what I wanted."

"You could have fooled me with your superior, gloating act."

Something defensive flared up inside of Lauren. She could feel Evony's pride like midsummer glare. Smiling bitterly, her breath hissed before she spoke. "You did lock me up in a dungeon. After sending someone to sleep with me. Not to mention you played tricks, allowed the Light to hold Nadia over me even though you knew what happened."

"Ah, yes. So it was just payback then?" The orange juice pressed to her lips, her eyes hovering on Lauren's while she waited for an answer.

She was studying her, Lauren realized, looking for a chink in her armour.

Carefully, she chose her words. "Partially. Not all of which was necessarily directed at you. I had bigger plans at hand."

"Well, congratu-fucking-lations. Payback received." Evony sighed, dropping her head back against the couch. Quiet froze over them, keeping them tense. As Lauren tidied up the mess, Evony finished off the food and set the plate down. "You're a cold hearted bitch, Lauren," she said, looking over at her. "But I can almost respect it."

"Almost?"

"Directed at someone else, I would have offered you praise. Hell, if you even told me your plan I might have helped you take some Elders down that have been grating on my nerves. But needless to say, I'm taking it a little personally." Lauren stepped closer, setting down on the opposite side of the couch.

"Ev-" she stopped, thinking better of it. "I didn't realize that-"

"Don't," she warned. "I'm tired as it is. And..." her throat swelled. She turned her head away, jaw clenching. "Well, I have nowhere else go." She let out a barking laugh, the irony not escaping her.

"What about-?"

"What?" the anger returned vehemently as she snapped her eyes to Lauren. "Friends?" she offered, "Or perhaps you think that someone I know wouldn't see this-this bullshit as a step up the ladder and snap me in half with their bare hands." She breathed out heavily, hand over her wound. "You took everything. My power, my position...and my life. And the thing is, I think you were hoping this would happen."

"I didn't-"

"Think?" she offered. "Oh, I believe you did. In fact," Evony leaned forward, smirking as she invaded Lauren's personal space, "I think you're a lot darker than you let on, Doctor Lewis." Lauren held her breath, staring. She refused to give in to the obvious bait being offered. "And I'm betting you enjoyed working for the Dark. More-so than you realise."

"I didn't. I did it-"

"For Bo?" Evony laughed. Then, seeing Lauren's expression, the way her muscled shook with tension, she quickly sobered up. "I'm sure you tell yourself that to keep warm at night. But between you and me, we both know that you did it to get off."

Lauren's face twisted furiously before she stood up, walking away from the conversation before she accidentally punched the Morrigan again.

Evony laughed mirthlessly as she asked, "Was it something I said?"

Lauren turned to say something, a defense on her tongue when the apartment door slammed back on the wall. Jumping, she turned, coming face-to-face with a man holding a gun, pointed at her. "Human."

Lauren's brows raised. "Yes?"

"No, not you. Her." The gun moved to Evony.

"Oh, right. Lauren, I forgot to tell you, I'm being hunted down by the Dark Fae and it's all your fault." Evony sighed, "In fairness I didn't think you were that close behind me. I would have thought the explosion might have stopped you."

"You left an easy trail to follow."

Evony's brow pulled before she remembered the blood. "Oh. Right." As the man stepped closer, her body tensed, anticipating what was going to happen. Something stopped her, schooling her features, she waved her hand carelessly at the man. "Get it over with, I want to see what all the fuss about damnation is about anyway."

Lauren looked from the gun to the man, calculating her move carefully. He held the weapon steadily with both hands. The safety clicked off and Lauren stepped closer. "You can't," she said firmly.

The man looked to her. Registering that she was in the apartment as well. "I'll kill you too," he warned.

"She's claimed by Bo, you can't take her." Lauren was almost surprised by how quickly the lie came.

Evony stilled, then changed her expression before the hired gun could see. Instead, she looked to Lauren, watching the doctor raise her hands in surrender, moving to step in front of the gun. Idiot.

"So? She doesn't care for her-"

"You really want to take her on when she finds out what happened?" She stepped closer. He wasn't much taller than her, lithe, dark hair. Lauren tensed, then relaxed. "Look at her, she's in my apartment, in my clothes, looking pretty relaxed if you ask me. Does that look like someone who broke in?" The man glanced over to Evony before Lauren lunged, her hands grabbing his wrist, disarming the gun.

He struggled to fire, but his finger was torn away from the trigger. Lauren squeezing, twisting as she broke his wrist before she kicking him backwards. The gun dropped to the carpet. Grabbing the weapon, Lauren pointing it to him, clicking the safety back off. "Bad move," she smirked.

"Woah," he stepped back. "Look, I just want her."

"Kill him," Evony demanded. Lauren didn't pay attention, sidestepping to block her view from the man.

"Leave," Lauren said. "Or I'll shoot you in the foot. Then I'll start aiming higher," she lowered the weapon, keeping eye contact. He didn't move, eyes switching from Lauren to Evony. "The wound won't kill you, technically. You'll bleed out first. If I shoot you in the leg you'll be in pain for about as long as it takes for someone to find you here and call the ambulance. Unless you crawl yourself over to my phone which is hanging over the kitchen bench. You probably can't see it. If you don't make it, well, you've got about three hours of pain to deal with, but don't worry, the first few seconds it'll just feel hot. Then your brain will register something's wrong and start receiving signals from nerves around the wound, telling you you're in some of the worst pain imaginable."

The guy blinked, but didn't say anything, paling at the idea. Evony tried not to laugh.

"Leave or you won't live long enough to feel humiliated when your buddies find you curled up at my doorstep." The guy stumbled back, then ran from the apartment. The moment his footsteps faded, Lauren began to tremble. Safety back on, she slammed the door shut, locking it behind her before she sagged, falling to the ground. "Shit."

"He's not the last one," Evony said calmly. "There are others. Better ones. He just managed to stumble across me on my way here."

"And you lead them to me?" Lauren asked, raising her head to look at the woman on her couch. Evony didn't look all that amused. If anything, she looked hurt. Lauren frowned, remembering what she said. She had nowhere else to go. "Bo-"

"Send me to that insipid bitch and I'll kill myself before she gets a chance to interfere with her succucrotch." She tilted her head, looking away spitefully, "Though I doubt that I could claim the bounty if I kill myself. Not that I need ten million."

"Ten mil-" Lauren shut her mouth, diverting the conversation. "What do you want from me, Evony? Do you want me to get shot as well?" Evony shrugged. Rolling her eyes, Lauren threw her hands in the air. "Of course you do. Fine. Sure, come to my house and take out two birds one stone, hmm? I'm sure that'll fix all your issues."

"Look, for what it's worth, I didn't think they were that close behind me. I thought I had enough of a window to kill you, grab what I could and move on."

Lauren raised an eyebrow but didn't comment. She held Evony's gaze before sighing. "Come on," she said dryly. "I have a plan." Sort of.

Walked over, she grabbed her medical kit and continued down to the hall, into her bedroom. Evony followed, passed the wall of artwork, before leaning against a chest of drawers as Lauren tore through her belongings. She threw supplies into two separate duffle bags, grabbing a small box from the bottom of her wardrobe before zipping up both bags, filled with clothes, amongst other odds and ends. She slung one over her shoulder, throwing the other at Evony.

"What are you doing?"

"What's right," Lauren said. "Just...follow me." Outside the apartment, Lauren lead Evony down to the apartment parking lot where she pulled out her coat hanger. "Unwind it," she directed, handing over the wire coat hanger.

"Why?"

"Just do it." She paused, looking at Evony. "Please."

Evony blinked, unwinding the metal as Lauren pushed down on one of the car's windows. When there was enough of a gap between window and doorframe, she took the coat hanger from Evony and maneuvered it to the lock.

"You've got some skills."

"Yeah, well, we're going to need them," Lauren said. The door opened and quickly she climbed into the driver's side, pulling out a set of other tools from one of the bags and began undoing the panel underneath the steering wheel "If you asked me this morning what I'd be doing. Helping you escape isn't one of them."

"You're not going to just leave me with a rigged-up car to drive, are you?" she asked. "Where will I go?"

"I'll take you to someone, get you new papers. You can go to Australia for all I care."

"It's been a while since I've surfed the coast," she admitted. "But these papers better be good. If I get to prison, so help me-"

"You'll what? If you had friends in high places, you wouldn't be here," Lauren said, fiddling with wires as she attempted to hotwire the car. Evony stared at her, arms folded across her chest. At the silence, Lauren looked up, offering her a smile. "They'll be good enough. I have a good contact."

"I'm supposed to believe you're doing this out of the kindness of your heart?"

Lauren was quiet, fiddling with the wires before the sound of the engine started. "Yes!" she grinned, sitting back up in the driver's seat. The tools went back into the bags, tossed over in the backseat, before she climbed in properly, shutting the car door. Looking up at Evony, she directed her eyes to the passenger's seat beside her, winding down the car window. "Are you coming?"

"Where are you driving to?"

"Australia," Lauren smiled. The Morrigan didn't smile back. "Look, just trust me."

"Cute."

"I'm serious. I mean-" her hands scrunched up, frustrated that she couldn't find the words. Dropping them, she sighed, looking up at Evony. "Don't trust, trust me, whatever you want to do Evony. Just get in the car."

"Or what?"

"Or I'll leave and you can do whatever it is that you want to do. I mean, clearly you can sort out this mess yourself," she said dryly. Evony breathed in, holding it in her lungs before she dropped her folded arms.

"Fine." She stalked around to the passenger side of the car, ripping the door open and climbing inside. "Who's car is this anyway?"

Lauren smirked, the window going back up, "yours, actually. Well, one of them."

Evony's eyes ran over the car, not recognising it. "Dark Fae company car?" she asked.

"You're still the Morrigan, you know. So it's still yours."

"I know that," she bit back, sulking. "In bond only. I walk into my office and I'll be a human shishkabob." Her hand flicked nonchalantly, but guilt had begun to worm its way into Lauren's stomach. "Thanks for that, by the way."

"Think of it as an extended holiday?"

"My accounts are frozen. My homes were taken," she breathed out, shaking her head. "And I need a manicure."

Taking the gear stick in hand, Lauren pulled the car into reverse. The reverse camera came up and immediately Lauren slammed on the breaks, staring at the man holding a gun. "Get down."

"Why-?" A shot fired and Lauren let go off the breaks, pushing her foot down on the accelerator. The wheel spun in her grip as she swung the back of the car, not to the man, but towards the other bounty hunters standing by. "I take it that ten million means a lot to some fae."

"They want to name a new Morrigan. Unfortunately, they can't until I'm dead." The other hunters scattered as the car's trunk nearly hit them. Thrusting the car into gear, Lauren pressed her foot down on the accelerator as another gun fired, shattering the back window. Driving out the parking lot, she veered left onto traffic, nearly hitting another car. Evony was still talking calmly as if this wasn't a life or death moment. "Of course, there are other ways to sever the Morrigan bond between myself and the land, but death is the quickest. Protocol and all."

Lauren's foot pressed down harder, driving through a red light. A speed camera flashed as Lauren drove onto the main road, heading towards the highway.

"Lauren. Where the hell are we going?"

"We need to switch cars."

"We just got this car!"

"Yes, and now it has a smashed back window which stands out to both the police and the fae." Evony blinked, looking behind her.

"Oh."

"Yes, 'oh'."

Evony sighed, settling back in the car. She hissed, clutching at her side.

"What?" Lauren asked, turning to look at her. Her eyes flicked from the road to where Evony's hand laid. "I'll take a look at it when we get to a gas station."

Evony noticed that after a few strange turn offs, Lauren had reduced her speed to the limit. "I'm fine," Evony said.

"If you lose any more blood fine will not be part of your vocabulary." Lauren made another turn, looking behind her as they stopped at the lights. People were looking oddly to the car. If she wasn't careful, the police would pull them up. Looking to make sure the light was still red, she reached over, pressing two fingers to Evony's pulse.

"What are you doing?"

"Checking for any signs of blood loss. You look pale, but you're not sweating any more. That's good."

"Thank you," Evony glared. "I'm fine. The light's green, by the way."

"Oh." Lauren drove, a little faster than necessary but not enough to cause panic. Pulling up on the side of the road, she pulled into a gas station and sighed, parking around the back. "We might have to walk to get another car."

"So...why are we parking here?"

"I need supplies. Just...follow me, okay?" Pulling out the gun, Lauren stuffed it into the waistband of her jeans, covering it up with her jacket. Slowly, Evony climbed out of the car. Frowning as she tugged at the shirt and pants Lauren had given her to wear.

"Unless the supplies is money-"

"We don't want the police coming," Lauren said, grabbing the bags from the backseat. Pulling out her phone, she walked into station and began picking out overpriced food and drinks, and assorted other things before heading towards the counter. Dialing a phone number, she grabbed the magazine in Evony's hand and placed it back.

"Yo, doc. What's up?"

"Hey, Kenzi. I, ah, need a favour."

"What kind of a favour?" Lauren could hear music in the background of the phone. "Do you want Bo?"

"No, no. Don't tell her it's me."

Kenzi was quiet on the other end, before clearing her throat. "What do you want, Lauren?" the tone was harsher, dangerous.

"Look, I don't mean to put you in an awkward spot, but you know that I wouldn't ask if this wasn't necessary." She handed the groceries Evony, pulling out her wallet to give her her credit card. Evony glared before stalking over to stand in line. Lauren got the feeling that she didn't do queueing up very well.

"Lauren-"

"I need a contact. Someone who can do false documents; passports, birth certificate."

"What for?"

"Just enough to get overseas. Do you have someone?"

"What are you doing?"

"I'm doing nothing. It's not for me."

Kenzi paused. Lauren swore she could feel the suspicious stare on her. "You swear?" she asked carefully.

"I swear. After I deal with this situation," she looked to where Evony had, once again, managed to grab a magazine to flick through. "I'll be back home."

"This isn't some trick to get me to hand over the information?"

"No. No trick, Kenzi. I just owe someone. Big time."

"Well you already owe me big time. This will be like ginormously big time. Especially if you don't come back," she sighed on the other end. The music getting louder briefly before the phone returned to her ear. "There. I texted over the deets. So just. Come back safely okay? Or I'll kick your scrawny ass before Bo gets a chance to know what happened."

Lauren laughed, smiling, "Alright, thank you Kenzi. I owe you."

"Damn right."

Lauren hung up, frowning as she looked at her phone. Evony was at the cash register, handing over the credit card over. "Can I use this?" she asked, pointing to the pen on the counter.

"Sure," the guy shrugged. Lauren smiled, grabbing the back of a business card. She scrawled the address on the back of the card and stuffed it in her pocket. Then she turned off her phone, placing back in her pocket. She'd remove the battery later. "Thanks."

"No problem?" the guy said, handing the credit card back to Evony. Lauren snatched it back before she could forget.

"You don't have to be rude."

"I don't trust you with money," Lauren said, looking over her shoulder.

"Why not?"

"When's the last time you had a budget that was under a thousand dollars?" Evony's mouth opened, then shut, frowning at Lauren.

"Whatever. Just get me out of here. And I'll expect new clothes."

Lauren shook her head, "We can discuss clothing later." Evony's brows raised. "I didn't mean that."

"I'm sure you didn't. Even if you did, I wouldn't touch you or your fae-defiling vagina again." Lauren stopped, sighing as Evony walked on ahead. In fairness, she deserved that one.

"Come on, let's just go steal a car."

"Anther mercedes?"

"No."

"Bently?"

"No."

Evony glared. "Jaguar?"

"Really?"

"Fine, fine, whatever, we'll settle for the Prius."

Lauren glared, tempted to get the Prius in spite. Before her eyes came across the perfect car. "How about a VW?"

Evony turned around, looking to where Lauren's eyes were before she snapped back to Lauren horrified, "That thing," she said pointing across the road, to where the volkswagen van was parked in an residential lot. Orange, old and glaring at her.

"It's perfect."

"It's not exactly discreet," Evony said. Lauren sighed. She was right. Still there wasn't much else to pick from and she wanted to get on the road as soon as possible. "You still haven't told me where we're going."

"It's...a bit difficult," Lauren admitted. "Just trust me when I say far away."

"I don't like this."

"Neither do I

Walking over to the residential parking lot, she stopped as she came to a crew cab with a camp shell. Evony watched where her eyes went, her smile breaking out into a grin. "Not a prius girl," she said.

"Nope," Lauren smiled. She was never a Prius girl.


	2. Reckless Endangerment

2. Reckless Endangerment

Lauren yawned, overtaking the blue Ford in front of her. Her eyes squeezed shut, mouth opening widely as she swerved left. They were on the highway, making their way slowly to an old friend of Lauren's. The address Kenzi gave them was the stop after and basically hook turned them backwards across borders. They had just over a day's trip ahead of them if Lauren pushed it, then another few days on top of that.

It seemed like a good idea at the time. Now, with the sun sitting low on the horizon and rising fast, it felt like a very bad, stupid idea. Knowing the statistics of sleep deprivation on a highway, you would think she'd choose a better option. Like sharing the driving with Evony.

Peaking at her, Lauren grimaced at the idea. Evony was probably not the best option either.

Stifling another yawn, Lauren groped beside her, only to find the middle seat empty of what she needed. Turning her head, she saw the red label peaking out, nearby Evony's boots. "Pass me the bottle of coke."

Evony looked down at her feet, picking up the empty bottle. Tilting her head then, she peered at her curiously as to why she'd want a bottle of air. Lauren groaned. "What? I was thirsty," Evony defended.

"Well seeing as how caffeine dehydrates you, yes, I can see how that helped both of us." She breathed in, holding the breath low in her belly. She could do this. She just needed to keep awake for a little while longer and just imagine Evony as a defenseless, silent bunny rabbit who was going to hybernate for the rest of the car trip.

Adjusting herself in her seat, Lauren flicked on the AC, turning it down low. Beside her, Evony pouted, "Well, it's not my fault."

"Actually, yes, yes it is your fault. You drank half a bottle of coke!" Lauren hissed out a breath, forcing herself to relax. She was cranky and Evony was not making it easier. At least she'd been quiet for the most part, taking naps here and there when exhaustion took over. "Look, just past me the Sprite."

Evony shrugged, throwing the empty bottle onto the back seat before she reached to the lemonade, handing it over to Lauren. Lauren placed the bottle between her legs, one hand on the steering wheel as she opening the lid. The bottle exploded. "Shit!"

Evony laughed, watching as the lemonade went everywhere in Lauren's lap. "Oh honey, didn't anyone ever house train you?"

Lauren's eyes pierced over hers, lifting the bottle to her mouth. "Did you do that?" she asked, taking a sip. Choking, she side-eyed Evony as if it was her fault she'd inhaled the drink up her nose.

"No, that was all you."

"Did you shake up the bottle?" Lauren asked. A car beeped beside them and Lauren's eyes snapped back onto the road, switching back into her correct lane. "Just don't do it again."

Evony sneered at her. As if she would sink so low as to shake a bottle before handing it to someone. "I'm not that juvenile."

"Could have fooled me."

Evony's jaw clenched. How dare Lauren come of acting as though she was the victim in this situation. Self-righteous, the fucking lot of them. This was why she kept human's at an arm's length away and for shorts bursts of moments only. "Keep to yourself, doctor and we won't have any more issues."

With the quiet holding over them, Evony settled into the seat, shivering with the AC. She felt Lauren place the lemonade bottle back down at her feet but just as she thought the good doctor was going to turn the damn thing off, the temperature seemed to lower. Opening her eyes again, Evony looked to the AC. Full blast, temperature just above freezing.

What the fuck.

The human doctor was shivering briefly, her skin broken out with goosebumps. Still she made no move to do anything about the temperature.

"It's cold," Evony snapped.

"I know."

"Fix it."

Lauren gave a short look, sighing. "I can't."

"Well, I don't like it." She reached out to turn the AC off, Lauren's hand snapped it away. Glaring at her, she swerved on the road briefly. "Dammit. I'm exhausted Evony. The cold makes it difficult to sleep."

"But I want to sleep."

"Oh for fuck's sake." Knees holding the steering wheel in place, Lauren reached into the back seat, grabbing one of the bags and throwing it onto Evony's lap. "There's a sweater somewhere in there. Put it on and stop complaining."

"Touchy," Evony teased. She unzipped the bag, looking through contents with interest before pulling out the eggshell coloured sweater. "This is an actual sweater," she commented, staring at it. She'd never worn sweaters. She had no reason to. when jackets had merely been an accessory. But all of that was before some idiot blonde woman changed her DNA.

Shooting a look to Lauren, she looked from the sweater to her. "You've got to be kidding me. This is the best you have?"

"Take it or leave it, Evony," Lauren said, reaching to turn the temperature down lower.

The Morrigan scoffed. Undoing her seatbelt, she tugged it on, immediately thankful that Lauren had removed the battery out of her phone. There was no way in hell she'd let anyone see her this way.

Not that it really mattered. Salvaging her reputation from this seemed impossible. She'd have to kill everyone and start over. Not that she hadn't contemplated that before now.

Shutting her eyes, she laid back in the seat, squirming in the material. She still wasn't used to feeling everything. The sweater was soft and yet still itchy. Or ticklish. Is that what humans meant by ticklish? If it was, she didn't like it. "Put your seatbelt on."

"Make me." Lauren glared, grabbing the seat belt and shoving it on. Swerving on the road again. Evony's eyes flew open. "Are you fucking insane?"

"I could say the same about you! You're human, Evony. Do you understand that?" Evony breathed out sharply, tossing her head to look away. "You get that a car accident will kill you. A collision will throw you out of the window at this speed. Your bones will shatter, your ribs will break and probably puncture a lung or other vital organs. Then it's just a matter of bleeding out, brain damage or cardiac arrest. Do you understand?"

Evony shuddered, then smoothed her features before she could see. "Oh honey, if there's a car accident, you will be the one driving." Lauren side-eyed her, stifling back a comment. Her shoulders squared, muttering to herself, dirty comments Evony didn't care to listen to. Uninspired language. She was a doctor and she had one hell of a tongue on her. If she couldn't come up with something better than mountain troll than she might as well be reading a phone book.

Relaxing back into the carseat again, Evony fixing herself in the seat belt, rubbing where Lauren's hand had yanked over her torso. It felt like it might actually bruise. Evony frowned at that thought. Bruises were all well and fun when inflicting them, having them was another thing entirely. She didn't get bruises before. It used to take a lot more force to rupture blood vessel than a simple blow to her body.

She was beginning to understand why humans were always whining about torture.

"How long until we get there?" Evony asked.

"Soon."

"Soon is not good enough. When will we arrive?"

"When you see a town," Lauren glared, looking over at the passenger seat, "then we're there."

"Ugh."

"If you don't like it, you can drive."

"At least I'd get us there before the sun goes down again," Evony bit back. She had no desire to drive this car. Truck. Whatever. They'd been driving non-stop, having a short break at a gas station where Lauren came out more disgruntled than happy.

Evony shut her eyes, head growing heavy. But as the road began to wind through a forest, a wave of nausea lurched inside of her.

Ugh. She hadn't felt that way since she was pregnant. Opening her eyes, she picked up the magazine she'd bought with Lauren's money and flicked through it. But even the gossip of her (now ex) clients couldn't stop the wave of nausea. Groaning, she threw the magazine away from her.

"What are you even doing there?" Lauren said, looking over at her. "You're making a lot of strange noises."

"You wish."

"I wasn't- that wasn't what I-" Lauren sighed, cheeks heating as she shook her head. Evony took some amusement at that, but as the road twisted, she found her humour lost. "Look, are you okay?" Lauren glanced to her. "You look like you're about to throw-up."

Evony paused, contemplating keeping quiet when the sickness lurched. "I feel strange," she admitted.

Lauren sighed, hands clenching on the steering wheel. "Probably from drinking half a bottle of coke on an empty stomach. Eat the chips."

"I feel sick. How will eating help the situation?"

"Eat the plain salt chips and keep your eyes on the road."

Evony glared. "Shouldn't you be keeping your eyes on the road?"

The hands clenched tighter around the steering wheel, her knuckles turning white. "If you don't want my help," Lauren said, "then keep quiet."

"Well how the hell am I supposed to know what to do?" she asked. "I don't feel nausea. Nausea was previously a sign of a fetul infection. You humans are so complicated with your bodies."

"Well not all women feel morning sickness when they're pregnant. Most do because of the drastic changes in hormone balance, blood pressure-"

"I know what causes nausea in pregnancy," Evony cut in. "I did my research." Flicking her eyes, she looked down at the magazine, unhappily glaring at it. "What I don't understand is why I feel sick now."

"Maybe you are pregnant," Lauren said spitefully, looking over at Evony. "Now that you're human, it's a lot easier to fall pregnant."

"Don't get cute, your vagina may be fucking fae-defying, but unless you were packing a fertility blessing up there, I doubt you knocked me up." Lauren's mouth twitched, turning to face the road again. There was a quiet moment before Evony made another noise of complaint, grabbing her stomach. Lauren sighed.

"You're carsick. The salt will-"

Terror flushed through Evony, "The car's making me sick?"

"What? No!" Lauren stifled back a hysterical laugh. She needed sleep. A lot of sleep. A whole day of sleeping. Dammit it was the weekend. "Motion sickness affects the sense of balance and equilibrium. Your body right now feels one thing but you're seeing another. Because of that, your brain is telling you that something's not right, therefore: nausea."

"Fucking fantastic," Evony grimaced. Grabbing the packet of chips, she ripped them open, slumping in the seat. "Just went I think I couldn't hate being human more, this happens."

"Well, get used to it. This is my life every single day and you haven't even dealt with the worst of it." Evony angrily bit into the chip loudly, knowing it'd bother her. Lauren barely took a second glance, instead reaching over to the radio and switching it on. As Evony began eating louder, she turned the music up. The Morrigan glared, reaching to turn it down when Lauren slapped her hand away.

"This is trash music, written by people who have no idea how to write or play instruments!" she snapped, changing the channel.

"How very eloquent."

"Don't start. I'm exhausted."

"Really? Exhausted, I wonder how that feels, Evony." Lauren fixed the station, turning the music up. The sound pulsed through Evony's ears, down her body and gyrating against every nerve. Sounds, as a human, had changed and not for the better.

"Nobody with taste likes this crap," she said, changing the channel. Fucking hell, she'd take the classical channel over this. At least there was ability there. Talent. Finesse. That and she had a thing for violinists.

"Well I like it," Lauren snapped.

"My point proven." Lauren pushed the channel back, just as the song ended. Her eyes narrowed threateningly at Evony. A car honked behind them just before Lauren drove off the road's shoulder. Lauren swore, swerving the car in place as Evony clung to her chair. "Pull over and sleep!"

"No! We're almost there." Sleep deprivation was growing into a horrible migraine, but the music helped to annoy her awake. She just needed to drive another fifty or so kilometres, then the highway town would be in sight.

However, when they drove past a road sign, Lauren realized she'd overestimated how far they'd travelled. They were still eighty kilometres away. "Fuck."

"What?"

"Nothing," Lauren grumbled. It was nine in the morning and all she wanted to do was crawl into a motel bed. She didn't care where she was sleeping, she'd take a bus station bench at this point.

Evony suffered the radio station by turning the music down to a bearable level. She was partially pleased and simultaneously annoyed that Lauren didn't argue with her, probably because she was too busy focusing on the road. How boring.

Unfortunately, as the next kilometre passed, it became prominent, very quickly that the coke she'd drank was working its way through her system.

"You need to pull over," Evony said.

"What?" Lauren glanced at her. "Why?"

"I need a restroom."

Lauren blinked at her tiredly. A sigh pulled from her lips as she tried to watch the road. "We'll be at the town in about forty minutes or so."

Evony adjusted in her seat uncomfortable, arching her back. "I need a rest stop," she said. "Now."

"I asked you when we stopped for gas if you needed to use the bathroom."

"Well I didn't need to go then, did I?" she snapped.

Lauren shook her head, trying not to take pleasure out of Evony's discomfort. "Well, you'll have to hold it."

"Lauren. So help me-"

"Do you see a rest stop on this road?" Lauren gestured. "There's nothing. I can pull over and you can go behind a tree if you're that desperate."

Evony gasped, horrified at the idea. This was the twenty-first fucking century. She didn't do tree squatting. Growling, she narrowed her eyes at Lauren. "Speed, do what you need to get there, but if you don't find me a toilet, Lauren, I promise that I will make the rest of your life a living nightmare."

"And how would that help the situation you're in right now?"

"Do it or you'll find out."

Lauren pushed down on the accelerator, narrowing her eyes as she drove on. They got lucky, there was a truck stop fifteen kilometres up the road. Pulling up, Lauren gestured for her to leave. Evony ripped out her seatbelt and shoved her way out of the car, stalking over to the dingy bathroom, scowling the entire time.

Lauren felt a chuckle raise in her throat, the Morrígan using a public restroom was more amusing than she'd probably ever admit to anyone.

She blamed the lack of sleep because it wasn't that funny.

Removing her seatbelt, too tired to get out and walk around, she shut her eyes, planning on sleeping for just a moment. Just a small nap while Evony probably tried not to touch anything in the bathroom. Lauren half hoped there'd be a giant spider on the door just to hear Evony scream.

But seeing as how she had lived a long life, it was feasible that Evony wouldn't be too sensitive to roughing it up. Lauren shrugged the thought away, preferring her mental image of a panicking Evony after the last few hours of driving. Her mind lulled, humour dying away and embracing sleep, assuring herself she'd wake up to the door slamming shut.

She didn't.

When she woke up, Evony had returned to the car, and had fallen asleep beside her. Somehow, Lauren had not only ended up spread out over the front car seat, but also over Evony, using her knees as a pillow. Shit. She did not need another ranting lecture about not touching her.

Muscles creaking, Lauren sat up, rubbing her shoulder. Evony was a lot more comfortable than she felt right with knowing.

Turning the ignition on, she started up the car. Music burst through the speaking, starling Evony awake. "Sorry," Lauren said, shutting it off. "I forgot."

"Bullshit," Evony yawned, stretching in her seat. She blinked at the dashboard clock, frowning until the numbers focused. "Two and half hours isn't much," she said.

"It's enough to get us into town. Well, me. Unless you'd like to drive?" Lauren groaned, blinking. She should probably get out and walk around first. But they were only forty kilometres away from their destinations. Turning to look at Evony, she watched as the woman removed the sweater, turning into a pillow before she snuggled back up to sleep. Her shirt had risen, revealing the bandages Lauren had placed there.

Without thinking, Lauren reached over and touched it. Evony froze at the touch. "What are you doing?"

"I need to change the bandages. Let me see the wound."

Evony narrowed her eyes, pulling away from Lauren. "It's fine. Itchy, but fine."

"Itchy as in it aches or itchy as in itchy?"

"It's itchy! That's all that matters." Evony tugged down the shirt, glaring.

"Well it could mean infection, or it could just be a sign that you're healing," Lauren said. She scooted closer, raising her hands ready to peel away the bandages. "Let me look at it. I'm a doctor."

"Thanks, I wouldn't have known that if you hadn't told me." Lauren glared at her. They both knew what she meant. "Besides, don't you think that you've done enough damage?"

"I wasn't the one who tried to stab you."

"No! You're just the reason I'm in this god forsaken mess in the first place," Evony flinched. Hitting Lauren's hands away from her. "I'm fine. That's what you humans say, right? When you don't want pestering doctors groping up your shirt?" Lauren bristled at the comment. "I'll just take whatever humans do when they get sick."

"Antibiotics?"

"Yes. That."

Lauren bit back the growl in her throat. She was going to kill her. She was going to kill the Morrigan with her bare hands. "We're not near a hospital, Evony. And I'm on my last twenty dollars. I can't afford to get you antibiotics if you fall sick because you wouldn't let me check your bandages!"

Evony blinked, "What do you mean last twenty dollars?"

"I mean that I don't have any more money after this."

"What about credit cards?"

"They can track our cards and so far, they don't seem to know where we are. Do you really want to ruin our great escape because you wouldn't let me check your wound?"

"It was hardly great." Evony looked away, biting at the end of her tongue. Fuck the doctor. No, wait, that's what got her into this mess. Lauren can go fuck herself for all she cared. "How are you supposed to...do whatever you need to do if you don't have any money." She looked at her, watching as the doctor licked her lips nervously, her shoulders falling slack.

"Look, I have a plan…"

"Yes, a plan. How fantastic. Which fae will you seduce next with your wonder snatch?"

Dark eyes snapped to hers as Lauren scowled. Evony almost grinned, gloating as the mark hit. "You are incorrigible."

"Why change what works?"

Lauren was about to screech and throttle her. Taking a deep breath, she closed her eyes and recounted the periodic table. She got all the way up to iron before stopping. "Evony. Why don't you want me to check the wound?"

The question caught her off guard. Evony blinked, then frowned. She had a retort on her tongue before it died at the simple, calm expression over Lauren's face. "Because." Great now she sounded like a toddler. She was having flashbacks to the mid-eighties with Massimo.

"Because?"

"I have no idea what you plan to do to me," she bit back. She took a breath, holding it low in her chest before giving in. "Fine, just be quick about it." Leaning against the door, Evony refused to look at Lauren as the woman grabbed her medical kit, snapping on a set of gloves.

Lauren tried to give Evony a reassuring smile, that the woman ignored, before she began untying the bandages, peeling back the gauze. The skin shivered at her touch.

"Well, it doesn't look infected. I'd still prefer cleaning it again."

"Just get it done, Lewis."

Lauren looked up, biting back a frustrated remark. The crease on Evony's forehead, pinching her brows together, struck coldly into Lauren's belly. Lauren flicked between the eyes; Evony was staring out at the windshield, watching wind blow across trees. But the edges of her eyes were narrowed, her lips pressed firmly together.

Fuck.

"There, all done." Lauren smiled, throwing the medical waste into a small rubbish bag. The bin outside was just near the toilet stalls and only a few feet away. Climbing out of the car, she disposed of the waste and came back to find Evony picking at the bandages. "You'll be fine in no time."

Evony glanced at her, frowning. "Can I turn the AC off now your highness?"

"You should speak." Lauren waved a hand, tired of arguing, "Sure, do what you want." She climbed back into her own seat, buckling up. Evony grinned, switching off the AC, then turning on the music. Lauren reached over, snapping the music back off. "No music."

"You said I could do what I want," she drawled. Lauren shivered, throwing her a dirty look. Whatever vulnerability had been there before was gone, now replaced with arrogance. Lauren rolled her eyes.

"Driver picks the music."

"That rule only applies if you own the car, Lewis."

Lauren shrugged, "I stole it and the license plates." Evony laughed. The statement may be true but that did not give her any right. Lauren had switched over the license plates with another car, telling her that it was unlikely the person would even notice until someone else pointed it out. By then they'd have switched both numberplate and cars again.

With police able to scan number plates as they pass by, it was supposed to give them an extra shot. In truth, though, Evony thought it was extra work.

But if it does work, it will be smart.

And if there was anything Doctor Lewis was, it was intelligent. Well that and a raging sex goddess but kudos given when deserved and Lauren did not deserve that after everything.

Besides she was almost certain half of the orgasm had been due to extra grown nerves, not Lauren's ability.

Back on the highway, Evony listened vaguely to the Top Rated show as Lauren grew exhausted again. As it slowly crept down to the top ten, Evony found herself growing bittersweet over the announcement. She felt oddly proud and reluctantly pained at the forced vacation she'd been placed on.

'Minerva Meyers, also known as Rita Grafton to those of up down in Ottawa, has been holding the top five spots for how long now, Sal?' Michael Briggs, the radio host, asked his co-host.

"Twelve weeks," Evony smirked.

'Twelve weeks!' Sally gushed over the radio. 'First with her single 'Inferno', now with her latest new song 'Running (out of time)', which is track number eight on her controversial album 'Frivolous Genocide'. And I have to say, I adore this punk-pop album! What about you, Mike?'

"I assume," Lauren broke in, "That Minerva's one of yours?"

"You say that like it's a bad thing," Evony grinned at her. "Or perhaps you're just jealous?"

"Jealous?" Lauren laughed. "What do I have to be jealous of? Her depleting sanity?"

Evony shrugged. "Rita signed with me about the same time you did, actually. She was doing quite well. Usually I have to do a lot more work, but she knew exactly what she wanted, kind of like you actually." Lauren stiffened. "I had a tour booked for her, before all of this shit happened. But, well without me there, she's likely to fall of the deep end."

"You mean her career will go down without your added burst of insanity-inspiring inspiration?"

"Well, that too. But no. Darling, it's so much more. You see, when I stop feeding from someone, one of two things happens; the first being that their mind begins to heal and with the correct lifestyle they'll return home. This happens to most of those I suddenly stop feeding from. However, I'm usually there to reduce the feed."

"And the others?" Lauren asked. Out the corner of her eye, she could see Evony's smile flicker.

"Those I leave without warning, because I have to depart suddenly or for whatever reason," her hand flickered, gesturing to the current situation. "They have a tendency to go insane."

"So? Isn't that what usually happens?"

"Oh honey, no. Where a feed goes insane, I keep it on a leash. I don't let it wander around like a stray pet. If I did, the world would be in chaos." She paused, tilting her head. "Or heading towards a revolution. Who knows?"

Lauren grimaced. "You know."

"You're right, I do. But Nero was a fucking train wreck who my idiot servant at the time, let out of sight and I didn't want that happening again. Really, I had business to attend to in Antium, was it that difficult to stop him from making decisions without my consent?" Lauren choked, staring at Evony briefly. "Road."

Lauren swerved at the last minute, almost hitting a car coming the opposite way. "Are you telling me that you're the reason Rome burned?"

"Weren't you listening? My serving girl was."

Lauren shook her head. Disbelieving what she just heard. Evony and...Nero. Evony had been Nero's...muse… Evony was really old. Clearing her throat, Lauren snuck a look at to the ex-fae, watching her clean her nails. "Did he...did he really play the lyre?"

"Horribly. But he was a lovely singer." Lauren frowned. Evony sounded almost nostalgic talking about Nero. It was...well strange to say the least. She wasn't sure how she felt about nostalgic-Evony. "It was a shame his life ended so soon." Worried. She felt worried.

Lauren sighed. "He committed suicide."

"Yes, well he was making a mess, wasn't he?" Of course he was.

Blinking, Lauren tried not to roll her eyes. But Evony's nonchalance itched at her skin. "Do you always kill your lovers?"

"No, not always. Sometimes they kill themselves." At the dirty look thrown her way, Evony sneered. "Don't get your morals in a twist, in this day and age, when I grow tired of a client they turn to alternative methods. Drugs, alcohol, and the above, whatever makes them feel like they're closer to me. It's not my job to mother them. It's their own lives that they're wasting."

"No, you just made them dependant on you and cut them off cold."

"Hardly. I grow tired of them, the feedings becoming dulled or the emotions they feel are lacklustre. I still use them here or there but it's like eating the same meal over and over again until it becomes tasteless. It gets boring. I want something exciting. Full of life and passion."

Lauren laughed. "Well clearly there are those you do find interesting to keep around." Evony smiled, laying back in the chair as she thought over her favourites.

"I've always had a soft spot for poets," she admitted. "But in this day and age, it's just not sustainable to support them. You have to move with the times."

Lauren couldn't help but ask, "Who else has been one of your feeds?"

"In general or in passing?"

"Both?" Lauren asked.

Evony laughed at her. The absurdness of the question. Where did she even begin? "I might as well ask what you've ate over a lifetime. Narrow it down and I'll do my best to answer," she was teasing her, but Lauren didn't hear the tone. She wanted to know about Evony, her life. Here was a woman whose history was far richer than most other fae. Over two thousand years of great, brilliant minds seduced into her bed.

She didn't know where to begin. Probably with one of the most known woman in history. "Cleopatra?"

"Once. Julius liked to share, I still don't understand what all the fuss is about."

"Kurt Cobain?"

Evony laughed, arching an eyebrow. "Do you really want that answer?"

"Jimi Hendrix?" At that, Evony sighed blissfully, sounding the most human Lauren had ever heard. "You look almost happy," she teased. Evony waved her hand, dismissing the comment. "Well...what about...Da Vinci?"

"Ugh. Him. Not for a lack of trying. But unfortunately, I wasn't his type." Lauren perked up at the comment.

"He refused you?"

"I didn't offer. Being ensl-" Evony cut herself off there, biting back what she was going to say. She shifted uncomfortably in her seat, glaring out the window. Bitter tension sat over them and Lauren felt herself grow awkward. Whatever Evony had been about to admit was terrifying enough to stiffen her limbs. At least for her to admit.

Instead of prompting another argument, she decided to sidestep the issue. "So...Michael Angelo then?"

"No."

"Oh, ah…" She blinked, trying to think of other historical people. There were a thousand names, none of which were coming to her at the moment. "How about one of the Borgias?"

Evony froze, her eyes going wide, "Let's not go there."

"Why?"

"Just keep you're eyes on the road, Lewis."


	3. Robbery Strong-Arm

**A/N:** to any french speakers reading this, I apologise furiously in advance. Also, to all my readers, I am so so thankful. If I don't reply to your review, I apologise, however I definitely read them all and all of which mean a lot to me and keep me going when my anti-muse is like 'forget it, no one cares', so thank you.

3. Robbery, Strong-arm

Lauren sat in the car, glaring out of the windshield. From the corner of her eyes, she could see Evony staring at her, waiting for her to do something. It was past lunchtime and Evony had already finished off the packet of chips. Bag of air mostly. When she'd complained, Lauren pointed out the air stopped the chips from being crushed.

Not that that deterred in her in the least from complaining. "I'm hungry. Can you just get some real food already?"

Lauren's eyes never wavered from the brick wall. "I only have twenty dollars."

"Twenty dollars can buy food. Can't it? I mean, aren't there those tiring ads on television about 'loose change' meals." Lauren side-eyed her before glaring back out of the windshield. They were currently at a gas station. One of the shittest one's Evony had seen, which she'd pointed out as Lauren pulled into it, before then commenting that they could rob the store blind and no one would bat an eye. "What are you waiting for?"

"A plan," Lauren mumbled. Running her hands across her face, she tiredly groaned, leaning back. "We need money."

"Yes. This has been established. Why don't we rob a bank?"

Lauren shook her head. "Too big." Evony blinked, before shaking off the surprise. Lauren almost smiled at that expression, similar to the 'Oh' she'd spoken, god, had it only been a week?

"Well the town's not exactly large. I doubt their biggest concern will be security. We could probably get enough to set us up in a motel for the night, at least."

"We don't need police on our tail on top of everything else," Lauren replied. "We need to get money. Just enough. A couple of hundred dollars and I'll work out something." She huffed out a breath, glaring at the wall in front of them.

"Well, you have a gun, don't you?"

"Yes…"

"Then we can rob this crappy place. See, plan solved. Let's get dinner."

"Not like that." Lauren groaned. She just wanted to sleep. No, actually, she just wanted to be in bed, curled up with a novel and have her biggest issue being her need to move to a new apartment. Again. Not Dark Fae bounty hunters that may or may not be on their tail who will definitely kill on sight.

"So we're not doing this because….?" Evony blinked at her. "Clearly it's not a moral dilemma, because from your history-"

"Yes, Evony," Lauren snapped. "I turned you human would you shut up about it for five minutes?" She glared, heaving out a breath and watched as a grin peeled over Evony's lips. The woman was freaking pleased that she'd gotten under her skin. Great. Shutting her eyes, she exhaled. Breathe out the worries or some crap. "Look, I'm sorry. I'm just-"

"I was actually referring to your more shaky history of running, keeping secrets, the army, ecoterrorism, your parents…" she trailed off smiling coyly at Lauren. "Should I go on?"

Lauren hissed in a breath. "You know about them?"

"Oh honey, there's not much I don't know about you." Lauren blinked, shivering before she turned away. Right. That was a thought she'd file away to think on later. "Now: food. I'm starving and I want something. A steak with a wine and mushroom sauce perhaps?"

Lauren hummed. Blinking. She unsnapped her seatbelt, climbing out of the car. The planned formed in her head rather quickly. Cameras are likely to be recorded in a backroom, money would require a key but not a pin. Easy. Evony followed to the front of the truck. "So you'll seduce the attendant and I'll grab his keys," Lauren said, looking at her.

"Excuse me?" Lauren stared at her. Shit. Whatever she thought she'd said. She hadn't.

"The plan," she explained. "You seduce the attendant, enough for me to grab the keys, get him away from the cash register and then I'll grab the money. The alarms won't go off and then I can get rid of the video evidence before he has time to realise what's happened."

"I am not seducing some idiotic, dropout pleb with no ambition."

Lauren's brain stopped, zoning in on the singular word. "Did you...did you just call someone a pleb?"

Evony glowered, cheeks turning red. "Newsflash Lewis, you're not the only exhausted one."

Lauren stifled the laughter, trying to swallow it back. It was odd to see Evony wearing grey cotton pants with a cream wool sweater, even more so to see her look tired and frustrated at her. She looked...home-y. If you could ignore the dangerous scowl. "So, you revert to latin when you're tired?"

"Ugh. Just seduce the attendant, Doctor. I need to get this key and be done with this situation already."

Lauren shot her a dirty look. "You're seducing the attendant, I'm getting the key. Remember?"

"No. You will seduce the attendant while I get the key. I don't think you exactly have the subtle touch needed to lift keys without notice."

"Excuse me? You should talk!" Evony scoffed, infuriating Lauren even more. "And you seduce people for a living." Lauren paused, knowing her next sentence was dangerous. "Just think of it as another day at work." Evony's head whipped to Lauren's direction, eyes narrowing across the bonnet of the car. Yep, dangerous, but she couldn't back down now and for god's sake she was exhausted. "What? Did I say something that upset your pride?"

"Please, don't think so highly of yourself. At least seduction is a part of my culture and a necessary tool of survival, what's your excuse?"

"I'm sorry?"

"Apology not accepted." Lauren huffed. That wasn't what she meant and Evony knew it. "You go around seducing people as a means to an end, all of which seems to come back to Bo. And don't give me crap that it was a necessary evil. You just wanted to get into people's pants and I am not one to judge. Well, much," she added as an afterthought. "But honey stop lying to yourself. It's exhausting."

Lauren pinched the bridge of her nose, grinding her teeth. "Twice. I seduced you and her, that does not concede to it being a usual event. And this is an entirely different situation!" In the back of Lauren's mind, she was aware that they were yelling at each other. God, the attendant was probably calling the police now if he'd heard.

Or thanking his lucky stars. Who freaking knew.

"How is it different from you spybanging your way around? Just shut your eyes and think of the succuslut."

Lauren hissed out a breath, biting back her anger. She could feel her hands curling into fists as the damn woman smirked over at her. As if she was in her office, wearing a Vera Wang and not in some parking lot wearing her sweater. Her sweater. Because she was cold. "You're a right bitch, you know that?"

Evony laughed. "Because of the succuslut comment?"

"Don't call her that!"

"Why not? Does it offend you? Or does it remind you that you're darling human sugarsnatch isn't enough to satisfy your succubus girlfriend?" Lauren stalked out in front of Evony, glaring at her. Evonly just continued laughed, unafraid of what might happen. "Face it, Lauren. The truth is, you'll never be enough for her and you know it."

Lauren felt herself become at peace. A short moment where the world held still. Then her mind caught up and realised she was crying out, tackling Evony to the ground.

The woman hit the ground, back first. Her head bouncing on the asphalt, eyes slamming open. She breathed out, winded and wide-eyed. Lauren's hand went around her throat, snarling as she pulled back to punch her. Evony grabbed her her wrist, yanking the arm away from her. She grabbed Lauren's head, fisting blonde hair and rolled them both over, pinning Lauren down.

Arms above the doctor's head, her knees pushing down on Lauren's thighs, Evony grinned down at her, rolling her hips as she sat up. "Well this is familiar."

"Fuck you."

"Language, Doctor Lewis." Leaning down to lower her centre of gravity, she kept Lauren's legs pinned beneath her own, her arms still in grip. "Now. Are you going to behave now or do I have to teach you a lesson?" That should not have sounded so…

Lauren shook her head, glaring through the blonde. "Just get off."

"Ooh, now that's a thought. Unfortunately, you're not my type."

"I was before," Lauren bit back, wriggling underneath in a last attempt to get out from under her. She came to the quick conclusion that there was no conceivable way out.

Evony barely faltered on top of her, nodding in thought, "That's true, but then you were the cute human doctor who had a crush on Seven of Nine." And Janeway and hell most of the women, but Lauren wasn't going to tell her that. "Now you're just another doctor who tried to play God. No better than Mengele or Clauberg." Lauren's mouth parted, pain shooting through her. Is that how she saw her?

Their experimentations were cold, no regard to humanity. They viewed their subjects as less than… Lauren blinked. Nausea lurching inside of her. Oh god… But she didn't. She wasn't- she- the fae mistreated her. They were wrong. They were bad. They were…

Oh god.

"Get off me. I think-"

Evony climbed off, watching as Lauren scrambled onto her knees and threw up on the asphalt. Sitting back on her knees, she heaved heavily, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand. She wasn't like them. She wasn't. The fae were different, they were-

Lauren threw up again. Dry heaving over the spot. Her hands trembled beneath her, digging into the gravel. Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck. Eyes squeezing shut, she inhale, trying to breathe.

"Car sick?"

Coughing, Lauren breathed heavily, eyes rapidly blinking. She looked up, the sky was grey. Of course it was. This was Canada. "Emotions tend to have a more physical effect on humans. Just wait," she smiled tiredly, bowing overself again as her stomach turned. "You're right, by the way."

"Of course I am," Evony smiled. Then paused, looking at Lauren curiously. "About what?"

"What I did to you. It was…"

"Wrong? I'm very aware. I mean of all people Lauren, why did you choose me to experiment on?" She rolled her eyes, gesturing largely around her. She looked tired though, the movement was slower, even her snark was only half there.

Lauren felt her breath rise, catching in her throat. She'd felt so right in what she'd done. It had seemed like a good idea. And after Evony made it clear that she wouldn't stop hunting Bo...well, it seemed like a good as time as any to put her plans into motion. Lauren sniffed, squeezing her eyes shut. Hubris was a fault she often fell into. The Light Fae used to keep her in check.

The Dark just expected it.

"You're not crying are you? Gods, Lauren. Don't be so dramatic. It's a useful trick, I could have used it against Elijah when I had the chance, but I'll take what I can get." She ran fingers through her hair, loosening knots. "But experiment on me again and whatever this 'treason' is, will be gone before you can beg for your life. Got it?"

"Got it," Lauren mumbled. Standing up. She dusted herself off, wiping her face. Dammit. Looking at Evony made her feel worse. "I'll fix this," she said. "I can fix this."

"Yes, well. You'll excuse me if I'm skeptical." She turned away, leaning back on the car. "At least that was thrilling. I haven't had a fight like that in a long time," she hummed, fixing her hair in the car's window. Her fingers touched under her eyes, glaring at the dark circles. Lauren almost found it cute, in a pathetic puppy sort of way.

"That wasn't a fight. That was a scuffle. At most."

"Ego still hurt?" Evony asked, looking over her shoulder.

Lauren glared, dragging fingers through the bangs of her hair. "Let's just...get this over." She pointed to the side door. Evony straightened her spine, shoulders falling back. She looked more regal in the grey pants and sweater than Lauren could pull off in her best fuck-me heels. It made the guilt weaken minutely noticing that.

The side door opened to the shop. Evony marched in first, still intentending for Lauren to take to the station attendant when she saw just who the station attendant was.

And it wasn't the drop-out idiot with greasy features she was expecting.

No. She was a young girl, twenties, dressed in the green and black uniform. Partial japanese descent with sharp features and freckles that dotted over her skin charmingly. Lauren stood, surprised at the woman. Evony perked up, immediately walking over to her with a smirk on her features. Well, Lauren thought, that solved that issue.

"Bonjour! Pouvez-vous nous aider? Mon chauffeur est perdu." (_"Hello! Can you help us? My driver is lost."_)

The woman blinked at her. Lauren, too, stared at Evony. She knew the woman was french, well, technically from Gaul, but… it was another thing entirely to hear her speak the language. Still, she narrowed her eyes, glaring at Evony. "Je ne suis pas votre pilote." (_"I am not your driver."_)

Evony smiled back at her, speaking low enough so the woman couldn't hear. "Votre énoncé est terrible." (_"Your enunciation is terrible."_)

Lauren bit back a sharp comment, instead turning to the confused woman. She was standing still, eyes wide and mouth parted as though her brain was having a full reset. Lauren didn't blame her.

"Je…" she mumbled, shaking her head. "Je ne parle pas français. Much...I...I just moved here..." Lauren's enunciation may not have been top range, but that woman clearly didn't, as she said, speak french. She had to get a lot of crap from the town. "My grandmother's sick and I needed the extra money, and my grandfather…" she stopped as Evony stepped closer.

"Oh," the Morrigan purred. "Good. We are...lost," she smiled, her french accent being of course, freaking perfect. Lauren held onto her anger, cheeks turning pink. She had to focus on getting the key, not on the hot, fury building in her belly. She almost wanted to tackle-choke her again.

Today was like a PMS rollercoaster of emotions. Clearly, Evony brought out the worst in her.

The Morrigan worked quickly, speaking with the woman in hushed voice, pulling her away so the attendant could explain where they were and just how far from town the gas station was. The key was passed into Lauren's hand before she could get close. The poor girl didn't stand a chance against Evony's seduction technique. Which just involved french, lots of touching and of course, Evony's voice in her ear.

Watching carefully, Lauren quietly made her way around the bench, keys palmed in her hand. Unfortunately, the register was old and stuck. When Lauren finally yanked it open, coins spilled out, drawing the attention back to her. Evony glared, the woman looked horrified. "What are you doing?"

Lauren opened her mouth to reply, but Evony grabbed the woman's shoulders. Seduction masking her desperation to draw her back. "She does not speak english, hmm?"

Lauren held up a pen, smiling the shyly. The girl wasn't fooled. She ripped from Evony, storming over to Lauren. Lauren froze before the keys were snatched away. The attendant grabbed her mobile phone from her pocket, holding it up like a weapon. "I'm calling the cops," she warned. "Leave and you might get away."

"Merde…" Lauren said, staring. The woman looked at her, clearing understanding that one. Lauren punched her, knocked the woman out with a single blow. She stared, surprised as the girl collapsed back, dropping to the ground. That had not been part of the plan. Worse, she hadn't even consider hurting anyone. Shit.

"Good hit," Evony said, walking over to look down at the girl. "I'm surprised."

Lauren shook her hand, clenching it in pain. "Most martial artists work up their hands, giving small micro-fractures to build up the density of the bones and allow it to heal over time before re-doing the process over and over again. Eventually their bones can withstand the ability to punch through concrete without hurting themselves."

Evony looked at her. "Yes, and this is relevant why?"

"I don't do that and I think I broke my hand." Lauren cradled her hand, frowning at the attendant. "Shit." Dropping to her knees, Lauren should have checked the woman for a concussion before she even worried out her own hand. The woman's head lolled but an ambulance definitely wasn't needed, thank god. Lauren would never forgive herself if she'd done serious damage.

Cradling her hand, she lifted her face up. Evony was wasting no time, already stuffing the money into pockets, grabbing a few snacks as she went. "The videos are in the back, I take it?" She snatched the keys, making her way there. "Why don't you grab the rest."

"If we're lucky, she'll have short term memory loss."

"And if we're not?" Evony stuffed a key in the lock. It didn't work. She tried another one.

"We revise the plan and make sure this doesn't happen again."

"Ohh, doctor Lewis. Look at you planning heists. Now you're my type." Lauren looked away, feeling oddly comforted by Evony's nonchalance. The woman had no issue with her experiments. It didn't make it right, but it made the guilt stop twisting inside her. Now it just sat light a weight in her belly. Evony finally shoved through the door, grinning. "Finally! Oh, look. VHS. I forgot they existed. You know, somewhere in my archive..." she trailed off, "pretend you didn't hear that."

Lauren rose to her feet, hissing in pain. Her hand might not be broken but it would bruise. Hairline fracture maybe? Nothing serious. Walking over, she looked into the room and frowned. "It's not even switched on."

"Is there another camera?"

"Not that I can see." Her eyes went around the cluttered room. There was nothing of interest. "Come on. Let's just go to town." Taking the girl's phone, Lauren left the gas station. "Are you good to drive?" she asked.

"Now you're asking me?"

"Well it's not like you offered before. I assumed you didn't drive."

"I was driving before you were born," Evony scoffed. "I actually owned one of the first cars. Still sits in my collection actually."

Lauren's brows rose. "Of course you would have a collection."

"I collect art, why wouldn't I have a collection of cars?" Evony asked, arching her brow. "No matter. The situation is over, you can save your phone call until we arrive at the town. Whoever it is can wait, or…" she smiled. "I'll call them for you."

"I think not." Lauren's head bowed, horrified at the idea of Evony relaying a message to anyone she knew. "Let's just fill up the car and leave."

Lauren stalked over to the car, placing everything into the bags before she climbed into the front seat. The truck drove around with little issue to the pump. Evony immediately began eating a packet of chips, sinking low in the seat as Lauren climbed out to fill up the car. "Can we get something more sustainable than chips?" Evony asked, winding down the window.

"You were the one who grabbed them."

"Well I was hardly going to get the pies there, was I? Did you see the state of that gas station?" Evony scoffed, munching unhappily. "I want steak, Lauren. A red, juicy steak."

"Sounds like you're low on iron."

"I ate a steak about two days ago," she dismissed.

"Well, if you're not consuming vitamin C as well, it's likely that your body isn't absorbing it."

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Evony rolled her eyes, slamming her head back on the seat. "This humanity thing is bullshit. How do you deal with this shit?"

"Well, there's a large percentage of the population that is actually malnourished regardless of their weight status. With fast foods like McDonalds existing – which carry a low amount of necessary vitamins in their food, but are a lot cheaper to buy than actual fresh foods and meat – many people are putting on large quantities of weight without ingesting what their body's actually craving."

"Is that what you do? Eat salads all day?"

Lauren looked skyward, breathing in deeply. "I eat a range of different meals. When I have time to cook, I'm partial to making pizza actually. Hamburgers and chips sometimes. Pasta. Thai Chicken curry."

"Aren't they all bad for you?"

"In smaller quantities, no. I cook them all myself as well so less oils actually go into the food than if I bought takeaway. The fats and oils actually make it taste better than it really is. Which is why it's difficult to just eat one fry when you buy a side dish. Carbs especially help release the 'reward system' in the brain, making it addictive – are you actually interested in this?"

"No, it's just amusing to hear you babble." Evony stopped eating, setting down the packet. "Can we go already?"

Lauren pulled out the gas pump, setting it down. "Sure. We can go."

"You know," Evony said. "I told you you didn't have a subtle touch." She'd opened up a canned drinking, down it quickly. Lauren tried to remind herself that Evony was a victim here.

"The register was stuck. How was I supposed to open it?"

"Holding on to either sides of the drawer to reduce the force as it ejected from the register," Evony looked at her, waiting for Lauren to comment. Lauren fumbled briefly. Sometimes she forgot just how intelligent Evony was.

"So...ah, how much money did we get?"

"About four hundred dollars. Give or take." Evony shrugged, reaching into her pocket counting through the bills. "It's not nearly enough."

"No, but it'll be enough for supplies. There'll be a store in town."

"To get what?"

Lauren climbed into the car, hot wiring the engine again. She looked at Evony, smirking. "Well we can't exactly afford a motel, can we?"

"Yes. Yes we can. You don't plan on sleeping in this car again, do you?"

"The cab in the back has more than enough room for us to sleep comfortably," she looked up at Evony, watching horror melt over her features. Small comforts like that made Lauren realise she had a wicked streak.

"Us. As in both of us, in that small space? I don't think so." Lauren held the smile, working at the wires. She wasn't exactly partial to small spaces either. "Tell me you're joking."

"Some blankets, a few pillows, sleeping bags. It'll be like staying at the Ritz."

"Don't fuck with me Lewis. Tell me we're at least getting a three star motel with separate rooms."

"Oh no," Lauren smirked. "You're stuck with me for a long, long time."

"You're dead." The car started and Lauren sat up, bouncing as she put on her seatbelt. "A motel."

"We can get hamburgers for dinner."

"Steak. With wine." Evony corrected, narrowing her eyes. "Giving me one luxury, Lewis, or I swear to whatever higher power you believe in, I will make the next few days hell for you."

Lauren pulled out the stolen phone, dialing the number briefly as she smiled at Evony. "Trust me, this already going to be hell." Pulling out onto the highway again, Lauren smiled as the phone picked up. "Jenkins, hey!"

"Lauren...new number?"

"Err...sort of. I mean yes, well, borrowing a friends phone. It's complicated." Evony stared at her, snickering at the failed attempt.

"Cat got your tongue?" she asked Lauren. Lauren glared back.

"I'm sure…" came the dry reply. "I have your scarf by the way. When are you coming up?"

"Funny you should ask actually…I just called to give you a heads up. I'll be in town tomorrow or the next day, you know, depending when I leave. I need to collect that box from you. And of course, that scarf. Is it purple or pink?"

"You'll have to see. Do you have any doubt that it'll be epic? You owe me dinner though."

Evony's eyebrows shot up. Clearly the phone was loud enough for her to hear. "Dinner, no problem. How about steaks. Oh, ah, I'll be bringing another person."

"Nadia?"

"No...she…" Lauren trailed off swallowing. "Long story. Well, not that long but…" she sighed. Jenkins got it.

"Don't let Gem find out about this new girl."

"God, no. And it's not like that. At all. She's...a friend..."

"I know." Lauren could practically hear his cocky grin on the other. "Steaks and wine it is. I'll see you tomorrow or the next day. Give me a call when you know."

"Will do, thanks Jenkins. I'll see you soon." The phone clicked off. Handing it over to Evony, Lauren looked to where the bags were. The darker of the two carried necessary tools she used to mostly assemble furniture and sometimes break into cars. "Can you take the battery out of that phone too? Just in case. I doubt they'll be looking for it but better safe than sorry."

"Better safe than sorry?" Lauren shrugged. "You are far more ridiculous than I first took you for." The phone was an old motorola razr flip phone. It wasn't exactly high tech. Still, Evony was exhausted from all the arguing and too hungry to care. "Did he mention steaks for dinner?" she asked. "I could take hunting and killing something my self, I'm so hungry."

Lauren blinked at her, wondering if Evony ever had...probably. She probably made a sport out of live hunting humans, too. "Tomorrow...or the next day. We'll have hamburgers tonight. Or thai food." Lauren thought it over. "Whatever you want." As long as she stopped whining about it, Lauren didn't care what they ate.

"Real food," Evony muttered. "God I'd even take a fruit salad. Something that isn't chips."

Lauren looked at her, frowning. "It's probably from losing all that blood. Just keep your fluids up. I'll pick up some multivitamin when we go shopping."

Evony perked up. "We'll be going shopping?"

"To walmart," Lauren grinned. Catching Evony's wrathful expression, she flinched . "You can stay in the car if you want and I'll do it myself. But I'll need your cut of the money."

"Do you have a deathwish?"

"Apparently so. Look, just...relax. It's only walmart."

"And death is only a temporary setback for the fae, but don't see me walking straight for it."

"Temporary?"

Evony waved her hand. "Oh please, like you don't know."

"Well, no. Not really. The fae aren't exactly forthcoming when it comes to their history. Most of which I have to research myself and even then I can weeks looking at different sources of information that all contradict each other. It's exhausting, I'd rather use my time researching what I can with my own hands."

Evony blinked, then shrugged. "Well, I'm here now so if you have a question, ask away." Lauren opened her mouth, stuttering briefly before she closed it again. Where do you even begin? "Hurry up before I change my mind."

"I...tell me about the fae's life. After death."

Evony shook her head. "Boring. If you must know, there are different planes of existence. Death is more of a nuisance than anything else." Lauren gave her a look. "What? You didn't think life was really the end all? Please. There are different realms of existence, many of which humanity knows about, however, most of those have been exaggerated. Humans do love their fairy tales."

"And the fae enjoy embellishing their stories," Lauren counted.

"True. But what can you do? The truth is so boring. If they found out Hel was less fire and more just a hold on souls, well, the artwork would certainly be quite dull." Lauren blinked. Relatively speaking, she'd thought about life after death and so on. But it never had been a subject she thought too deeply on. "It doesn't matter though, as a human most of those planes I'm excluded from. Realms and doorways are shut because the human soul isn't old or simply strong enough to pass through."

Lauren held her breath, seeing a crack in the mask Evony wore. Barely noticeable, but there around the corners of her eyes. "You're afraid." Evony laughed at the comment. "You don't know what will happen to you."

"No, I don't," she agreed. Evony tilted her head, looking out the windshield. "But don't think that not knowing makes me afraid. What is there to know? You live, you die and either your existence turns to ash, or you prevail and move on. Being fae has the extra benefit of opening a few doors, nothing else."

"But-"

"The truth is Lauren, you may have turned my DNA human, but I was born fae. There are planes of existence I will still be connected to after death."

Lauren gripped the steering wheel, glaring before she turned her head to snap a retort. Evony's features were soft, vulnerable. Biting back the comment, she looked back to the road. She could see the town in sight.


End file.
